Next is a triangle shaped one that will fit in the corner of the deck.
As my 27th birthday approaches, I've been thinking about where I'm at, confident it's exactly where God wants me. I received a book as a gift at work, The Four Signs of a Dynamic Catholic by Matthew Kelly, and so far it has changed the way I'm doing things. The first two sections/signs, Prayer and Study have now made a constant routine in my life. I highly recommend this one, and I haven't even finished it. It is sure to change many lives and parishes.
We've been neglecting our Year of Faith Bible Study, but we've got time to finish. I've also been neglecting my journal entries, and the Imitation of Christ, only because they've been in my car and I forget they're there during the day. So before I typed that sentence, I went to the car and got them out, and placed them in my 'reading corner'.
We read Fr. Kevin Scallon's 'I Will Come Myself' and Sr. Breige McKenna's 'Miracles Do Happen', which were both wonderful stories of their lives, and incredible witness to the Faith. We'll have to do a post about their visit to St. John's in Zachary during the Lenten Mission, that I did put in my journal.
I also had an encounter with Fr. Mitch Pacwa at OLOM, after a talk he gave on social justice. He just struck up a conversation as if I was an old friend, and I felt the Peace of Christ emanating from him. After a brief questioning, and my answering that I was indeed married, and we were trying for kids, he suggested that we write to Mother Angelica and the sisters in Hanceville, AL. As he put it, "There have been a whole slew of babies born through the prayers of those nuns!". So we did, and I think the letter made it there just in time for her 90th birthday.
Fr. Chris finally came for dinner, and we had a nice lesson in aerating wine (always check the gasket). After dinner, he so kindly blessed our home, and enthroned the image of the Sacred Heart. It was wonderful, and there was an obvious change to us in the 'atmosphere' of the house as any evil was expelled. Having the image on the wall, across from Our Lady and Her Immaculate Heart, just makes it all feel completed, despite all the projects awaiting me.
But something that happened recently, that I'll never forget, happened the other day when I went to confession. I went early, because there's always a line (that's a good thing!). So I go in, and confess my sins to a priest in the shadow behind the little wall, one whose voice I didn't recognize. He had a very soothing voice, and an accent I couldn't place at all, some words could have been Latin American, others Scottish, so who knows. His advice is also something I'll never forget, he said, "Do not despair. Ask the Blessed Mother to stand beside you always, and help you to make your life a prayer." And while I was still absorbing this, he requested the act of contrition, so I did, and then he began the prayer of absolution. And that's when it happened, and upon hearing it my very being was set alight (and although I couldn't see myself, I'm sure there may have been a slight deer-in-the-headlights-look). As he spoke, there was another voice laid over his, a stronger and deeper one. I know it was the voice of Jesus, adding his with (or through, I guess) the priest's. Afterwards, I thanked the priest and walked out of there, with all that had just occurred resounding in my soul.
I don't know why that happened, I guess it could be for any number of reasons. But if Jesus did it, then they're all good reasons. Maybe he was reminding me who I'm coming to when I seek reconciliation. Maybe you reading this now, is the one who needed reminding.
I'll continue to persevere, and ask God everyday to show me the way. I'll continue asking the Lord for children. "Knock and the door will be opened to you", is how I think about it, and maybe He is seeing how long you'll stay there knocking. Well, I'll knock until my hand falls off, then I'll use the other. But I always ask God for His Will to be done in my life, and not mine.
I often get frustrated, because the things we have to endure aren't usually so clear-cut. Is it just a consequence of something we chose, or is it suffering sent to us for good reasons? Or is it all of the above?
I've been wondering about what to do career-wise, do I stay where I am? Have I accomplished what God sent me there to do or learn? Discernment. Do I explore using my degree again, although I'm about 2 years out of practice? Discernment. Do I schedule a meeting with the office of vocations about info. on the diaconate? Discernment. I know we can't always have our ideal job. But we can have the one God provides for us, because at whatever point in time, it's his ideal for us. Uh, discernment.
Sometimes we all move too fast, and these moments to think are lost. That's where my morning prayer routine is helping, I'm trying to give that time to God, so that I can have the time to listen. Prayer isn't always about talking and asking for things, it's a conversation which requires listening, too. Another area-for-improvement for me. I tried to go to the chapel for a while and just listen, and I know it will take work to listen well, but I just couldn't seem to turn my brain off.
In progression news, The Fathers Know Best is going well, taking that one section at a time. I usually read a Chesterton chapter before bed. And I'm up to page 104, paragraph 410 in the Catechism! That big green book is astounding me every morning I pick it up. Wouldn't you like that, to be astounded every morning?
Take care, and please pray for Becca and me as we work down the Lord's path for us.
~Nick
